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[15 Aug 2010|05:10pm] |
A lot has been said about things that don't really matter to me. Speculations pertaining to Tony Romo, my weight, break downs on stage, forgetting lyrics. I should actually rephrase that, things that don't mean that much to me I guess. Its just what people see out front. Just like for so long, everyone just saw this ditzy image that was protrayed once a week on t.v. I really try and keep who I am guarded. My friends know how I am, what I really think and how I really feel. So I say things in these one liners on chiper. Doesn't exactly go indepth on whats really going on in my head, aside from the random things.
I wouldn't know where to start, now a days, if someone asked me to. Okay well maybe lets start this as all good "fairy tales" begin?
In a land far far away, only not really... Just kidding. My name, incase you've not picked up a tabloid magazine or seen a pro-active commerical, is Jessica Ann Simpson. I'm a good ol' southern girl born and raised in Texas. My parents are Joe and Tina. They have, surprisingly enough, been married for almost 30 years. Unfortunately I didn't take after their good moral standings in that department. A quick review might be in order.
When I was just 21, I got married. At the time I had never been in love before him. Things were rainbows and romance. There were cracks in the tile, so to speak, even before we tied the knot. He wanted a "woman" and I'll be the first to admit, I was still in a girl in a lot of ways. I never lived alone. My mother still did my laundry and fixed my bed before I married Nick.
I was matched up as an open acting for 98 Degrees. It was my first real tour and honestly, my first real love. Yes, I dated before [soap star shall remain unnamed] but with Nick...oh it was something special. We were a match made in popstar heaven. No Justin and Britney but he did jump through rings to stay with me. Incase any of you forgot, I was the VIRGINAL POP PRINCESS. I preached about my vaules and morals, how it was good to keep yourself for your husband. I won't lie, now that I look back at it, it was a good decision as a teenager but in the day and age we live in maybe it was a mistake. After my career "took off" I, along with my father, thought that taking a break from the relationship was a good idea. All in all, it wasn't. It felt as if my heart had broken and there was no way to fix it. Well, like in all good stories, the princess got prince charming and they lived happily ever after. right?
Maybe in a sense? Then again with Newlyweds, we didn't get to really be "newlyweds". Everyone saw the flaws, the mistakes and instantly my fame proceeded me. I was the ditzy Jessica Simpson that couldn't even balance my own check book! Thanks to editing and the way I was presented, it was easy to fall into that. To play into, I should say. Then again, that got old and fast.
I knew I loved this man but love doesn't conquer all. There are many pitfalls and personality conflicts. Many of which weren't shown to the public. My star rose and his seemed to go into the blackhole with no hope of shining again. It wasn't my fault. People love a ditz, apparently. As I wanted to branch out and try something other than music, that's when things started to fall apart even more. The stress of the tabloids, loud whispers of infidelity and jealousy became overwhelming and before you knew it I was ready to let go.
All of that seems like a different lifetime, I don't even really remember being that person. So much has gone and changed me as a person. I've released a few albums, made a few movies but my most prized achievement is my Jessica Simpson line. Its taken off in ways that I couldn't have imagined. Simply starting out with shoes and purses lead the company my mother and I started to a 400 million dollar a year swimwear, outwear, and soon to be luggage and intimate apparel line! Tack on Hairdo with my best friend in the whole world Ken Paves, I've really got something to be proud of.
With the good comes the bad too. My beautiful baby, the only good thing to come from my marriage to Nick Lachey, Daisy Mae Simpson was killed not that long ago. When I had no one and I went through terrible break up after terrible break up, she was the only one there for me. Some people might say, its just a dog, get over it. Obviously those people never had a dog that was like family to them.
I've had to forge on and go about life but after all the recent set backs I've just thrown myself back into work. Price of Beauty started off rocky but took off amazingly! We've got a new Denim line for the jessica simpson collection. I am so excited because I get to do a promotional tour for it. I get to meet fans and we're doing this amazing give away where I get to style a fans wardrobe.
I can be goofy, act as if things don't really bother me and just go with the flow of things. There are little things that I take to heart, things that make my trust waver but I don't really hold grudges. Whats the point? Not to get all religious on you or anything but if anyone has the faith in a higher being, be it God, Jesus, Buddah, whatever... there is something said for turning the other cheek, forgiving and loving the person who's done you wrong. I believe in that, I might be furious with you one day but I sleep on it and we're good as gold tomorrow. Yeah, that might be hard to believe but thats how it is.
John Lennon wrote, "Love is wanting to be loved." I believe I've been there before. In love, might have fallen out but it doesn't mean that I'm filled with bitterness and the fact is, that I feel like I might actually have a chance to fall in love again. I have learned my lessons, I know what mistakes I've made and I know what my flaws are. Inspite of it all, I'm sure that things will work out and all will be good! Its not like I want to broadcast things but just getting it out of my system makes it a little easier to breathe. I don't know where this will lead me but I'm excited to find out. Things are on the upswing.
Things have changed and for the better. I've gotten to get to know myself and I'm not this little lost girl that was trying to do right by my father. There are some pit falls but who doesn't have them right? I haven't had the musical success that my sister has had, my films have done pretty well in the box office. I'm a new person with a good head on her shoulders or at least I'd like to think. I've put behind me the "Dessert line" which if you remember was the edible body line. Right now, like I said before I've got my JESSICA SIMPSON line. I'm so excited to see what life has in store for me next.
Good people in my life make for a good and happy life!
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